Impacts on the Family
The families of problem/pathological gamblers can go through similar experiences as the gambler: denial, stress, exhaustion, and hopelessness.

• Excessive debts are often thrust upon the family.
• Children of problem/pathological gamblers:
  - Attempt suicide twice as often as their classmates.
  - Have poorer school and work performance.
  - Are more likely to use tobacco, alcohol, and illegal drugs than their classmates.

• Anger - forms love/hate relationship, tries to blame addict for disease.
• Shame - embarrassed to be associated with a person so out of control.
• Hurt - the addict often will blame all the problems on the spouse and blame them for the addiction itself.
• Fear and Uncertainty - not knowing what condition the addict will be in (mood), uncertainty about financial health.
• Loneliness - lack of nurturing and rewarding interactions, feels rejected, unloved.

• Desire to be Perfect - pick up the slack, keep everyone happy, being extra light/funny to balance the negative mood and prove they are not the cause of the problems.
• Rebelliousness - draws negative attention away from the gambler.
• Apathy - withdrawal, overly quiet, isolating.
• Guilt - feel like they cannot do anything to help, self blame.
• Protects - makes apologies to family and friends or employer, supports addicts delusional belief "he just gambles to relax, if only his work was not so hard."
• Controls - tries to limit behavior or control its expression; may include behavioral control (stimulus control) or emotional control (begging, nagging).
• Blames - "If you would only gamble like other people, I would not be such a nag," or "if you do not do something about the problem I'll take the kids away and leave."

Adapted from Johnson, V. E. (1986). Intervention can help someone who doesn't want help. Hazelden.

• Accept and learn to live with the fact that problem gambling is an illness.
• To question or interrogate the gambler will serve no purpose. You are powerless over this situation. If the gambler has something they wish to hide, the truth cannot be forced from them.
• To nag the gambler about past losses or talk of what might have been if they hadn't gambled will prove to be detrimental to their recovery as well as yours.
• The past is gone and you will not find peace of mind until you can accept it without resentment.
• The gambler, not their spouse, should be responsible for calling their creditors to make restitution.
• Experience has taught us that it is not helpful to borrow monies or co-sign notes to cover gambling debts, while the spouse is gambling or when they come into Gamblers Anonymous.
• It is not recommended that the spouse go to work specifically to cover gambling debts.
• Prudence tells us that problem gamblers are seldom able to handle family finances. Perhaps this condition will be altered as they progress into recovery.
• Discourage friends and relatives from lending the gambler money.
• Gamblers Anonymous is a program for the compulsive gambler, the spouse should not interfere.
• It may be well to encourage the gambler to go to the first few meetings, however after this, their activities must be left to them. To force the gambler to attend meetings is very apt to do more harm than good.
• The gambling debts were not incurred over a short period of time; therefore don't be discouraged if they find it necessary to pay back small amounts of monies over an extended period. Normal family expenses come first.
• Recovery is a very slow process for the gambler. Give him your encouragement and have faith.
• Do take an honest inventory of your character defects and work on them.
• Come to Gam-Anon even though your spouse may continue to gamble. We understand your problem and if you have an honest desire we can help you through our program.

Courtesy of Gam-Anon.

Impacts on Finances
The financial consequences can be critical for problem/pathological gamblers. When problem gamblers run out of cash they use other resources including taking money from basic living costs, borrowing from friends and family, and illegal activities.

Personal Costs
Financial pressure and inability to repay debts can result in family, social, and legal problems. Problem/pathological gambling can be combined with other mental disorders including: major depression, bipolar disorder, anxiety or panic disorder, obsessive compulsive disorder, post traumatic stress disorder, or drug-alcohol dependency or abuse.

Problem/Pathological Gambling and Criminal Activity
Several studies of Gamblers Anonymous members revealed that two thirds of their members admit to illegal activities to support their problem gambling. For most problem/pathological gamblers, illegal acts are turned to out of desperation and occur late in the course of the problem.

• Chronically late for work, absent at meetings, late for appointments.
• Unexplained absences or disappearances, leaves early to gamble or arrange finances.
• Reads gambling related material openly during office hours.
• Excessive use of sick days.
• Vacation time centered around gambling activity.
• Does not take vacation time in large blocks, reluctant to take any time off.
• Takes long lunch hours to gamble or track bets.
• Frequently requests breaks to use phone.

• Borrows money from co-workers.
• Argues with co-workers about money owed to them.
• Credit card and loan billings mailed to work rather than home.
• Family inquiries about salary.
• Requests pay instead of vacation time.
• Theft of company owned merchandise or property.
• Use of petty cash to float an overnight loan, falsifies expense accounts.

• Organizing office pools and/or sports pools.
• Listening to or watching sports events while on the job.
• Making books for other employees, including employer.
• Receiving phone calls or visits from bookies, creditors, or gambling friends at work.
• Arranging card games for money during lunch hour or breaks.

• Decline in grooming habits, appears sleepy, eyes bloodshot, depression/anxiety.
• Decrease in capability and efficiency.
• Preoccupied, lack of concentration, assignments frequently not completed.
• Complains about family or other personal problems, especially money difficulties.

• Domestic violence, neglect of children and family.
• Relationship break-up, divorce.
• Job loss, unemployment.
• Debt, bankruptcy.
• Embezzlement, fraud, check forgery.
• Eviction, forced home sales.
• Crime, arrest, incarceration.
• Poor physical and mental health, and suicide.